Why So Many Women Have Given Up On Dating

Laura Wellington
4 min readSep 29, 2022


The trend isn’t age-exclusive

It is unfortunate that dating has become so distasteful for women to do that many have simply “given up” on doing it. And not just women who find themselves returning to the practice in the later stages of their lives, but those who are nearly just beginning and looking to have families. Expending the energy required to find a partner to love and cherish “till death do us part” seems to be coming at too high a price these days. Thus, women are opting out with grand disillusionment and frustration.

But why? Why has dating become such a chore today as opposed to any other time? I have my theories which I will share below. Some may not be too popular but it doesn’t make them any less valid.

  1. The Woman’s Movement Went Too Far — Sure, we gained needed rights and freedoms through this movement. But what began as a positive push in the right direction has ended in the castration of men to our own detriment, leaving us baffled by the fact that “we can’t have our cake and eat it too.”
  2. It Has Become Our Obligation To Do It All — No longer a choice, women have become obligated to “do it all” and we are exhausted. This obligation leaves us little energy to seek out or even ‘want for’ a man because when the dust finally settles, we need “me” time.
  3. Men Want To Be Needed — Independence breeds intolerance, which doesn’t bode well for coupling. Sure, men want to be “wanted” but they also want to be “needed.” Those who say otherwise are looking for mothers.
  4. It’s Become Too Easy In One Sense, Making It Harder In Another— With so many ways to meet people online, all of the romance and stickiness has been removed. In its place? Too many choices, disposable people, and bad behavior brought about by virtual partitions from one to another.
  5. Men Are Opting Out Too — Some are frustrated while others view dating as a measure of equality. Neither end up with the girl either by choice or reality. So they, too, give up.
  6. Nobody Understands The Rules Anymore — “Who we are supposed to be” and “How we are supposed to be” as single women and men today continues to be redefined daily and at lightspeed. No one can keep up so each is disappointing the other.
  7. He’s Just Too Old — Older, attractive men will generally date younger women, leaving the rest to date women of similar age. Choice pickings gone, older women would rather spend time with girlfriends than in the company of old geezers who may require them to become nursemaids.
  8. Situational Realities Get In The Way — Inflation, location, desperation, and so on…these and many other like realities play a huge role in women’s desire and ability to date.
  9. Family Fit-ness — Every family has their own tone and “working order.” And unless she can find a man that understands and respects both, she won’t open that door.
  10. Time Left Me Wanting — The glamour of fantastic careers and footloose-n-fancy-free living give way to the sudden, unexpected reckoning that everyone is married except them…and now it is a lot harder with a lot more heartache to boot. With more options available to have and raise children on their own, women are weighing their efforts accordingly.
  11. And finally, a new entry into the mix…Concerns Over The Covid Vaccine — Plenty of women have stopped dating because the Covid-19 vaccine has severely limited their dating pool. A large number of unvaccinated women do not want to date men who are vaccinated* and vice versa so they opt out rather than have to confront the ordeal of finding a partner with the same vaccine-status as their own.

Whether temporarily or for the long haul, “giving up on dating” doesn’t bode well for the future of the human race. As society has in some ways made a mockery of dating which is anything but funny, dating is an important part of our culture which is suffering under the stress that we have put it. And although I know plenty of women who have made the choice to stop dating entirely (women who seem completely fine with their decisions, “happier than ever” even), I have yet to meet one who isn’t somewhere secretly hoping that “Mr. Right” will suddenly walk in and bring along with him the romance of a lifetime.

*See Too: ”Unvaccinated Single Women Say ‘No’ To Vaccinated Single Men” — American Thinker”



Laura Wellington

Founder of ZNEEX app, TEDx Speaker, Award-winning children’s entertainment creator, Author, www.zneex.app, ljwelli@gmail.com, www.threadmb.com